Something like blood

It's Dec 24 Christmas Eve. All week long it's been close to 80 degrees and foggy and muggy. I'm now sitting in the living room the glow of the outside light in the courtyard lighting the downstairs area. The wind is blowing leaves all around in circles, little whirlwinds sounding like waves crashing against the french doors to our little courtyard. From hot to cold the weather goes in this part of the country. No white Christmas but it's now supposed to be cold at least.

I sit here feeling odd, the meds that I started this week are making me feel off. At times it feels like the blood in my veins is rushing through me like a flash flood making the world move at a 100 mph, sometimes it makes me feel cold and sluggish. Sometimes my muscles feel like their expanding and I fear that I'll turn into the Hulk. Sometimes it feels like my muscles are week and my legs will buckle under me when I walk. It's kept me up last night and I got the bear minimal of sleep. All because I keep getting a rash from the allergens in the air, which no one can figure out why as I have no other symptoms than a rash. I waited for tests that came back as negative, and the doctor had no real options to stop the reactions I keep having.

Doc: We can give you meds to basically shut down your immune system to stop the physical reactions. Or we can give you these other allergy pills and see how it works.

Is all he had to offer. I chose the latter.

Thusly here I sit listening to Broken Bells and Meridene's Something like blood, thoroughly enjoying the lasting and haunting riffs at the end of Something like blood.

Mix Tape Girl has long gone to sleep since coming home early this afternoon after taking the day off to finish shopping. I laid down with her for a few hours wrapping my arms around her. Her body pressed against mine keeping me warm. Feeling her hair in my face as she slept. Feeling her touch always makes me feel better. After a while the meds pull their trick again and I get up.

The night air is getting colder and thinner and I wrap myself up in a big plush blanket and sit in a dark living room listening to music and thinking about my blog and all my dear blogging friends. I sift through the blogs that are still active and catch up with your current events. I do hope you're all well.

I re-read this post and see that it makes no sense but I decide "To hell with it" and post anyways. To my friends out there, stay safe, be happy, enjoy being with family if you can, and know that I keep going and reading your posts when I can.

It'll All Work Out

It's near 11 pm and me and the cat sit in the living room. She climbs on the couch and walks on it's back till she reaches my shoulder. She sniffs the laptop and then lies down partial on the back of the couch and partially on my shoulder.

She's a new edition to our family. A stray with four paws and sharp claws, a rambunctious little critter. Mix Tape Girl can't really stand her but they get along still.

A few moments earlier I was lying in bed with Mix Tape Girl, talking about how we first met. How I had asked her out years ago and how she turned me down.

Me: I never thought I'd hear from you again after they laid everyone off.

MTG: Honestly I was hoping that you'd forget about me.

The answer surprises me and I turn from my lying on my back staring at the ceiling to my side facing directly at MTG.

Me: Why would I want to forget about you?

MTG: I didn't want to get your hopes up. I thought you'd find someone better. I...I..

Me: What?

MTG: I...didn't want an anchor.

Me: What do you mean an anchor?

MTG: I didn't mean it in a bad way. I meant..I meant that you seemed set in your ways, you worked full time, you took care of your parents, you were happy where you were. You were doing good but not really going to go anywhere else really? I just didn't know if you'd stay the same.

Me: Am I still the same?

MTG: No, you've come a long way. I just needed to be sure that if you changed you'd do it for yourself and not for me.

Me: And then a year or so later you called me out of the blue.

MTG: Yep.

I hold MTG in my arms and in a matter of minutes she falls asleep. I lie in bed staring at the dark ceiling. The bedroom recently redone, the few streams of light that come out of the sides of the new room darkening curtains MTG put up last week.

Gently rolling MTG over, I get up and brush my teeth. I'm not tired now so I go downstairs and write in my forgotten blog. Though most of my friends here have migrated to Facebook, I remain here checking on postings from others from time to time.

The cat jumps down and wanders around the living room. Looking back at me from time to time to see if I'm still there. The TV's on low and How I Met Your Mother is on. Sitting back in my chair I think to myself, am I an anchor?

I tell myself that I'm not, and slowly my eyes get heavy. I finish loading new music for work to my Ipod and publish this post into the once vast and traveled seas of Blogger.

Good night friends.

Much Too Young (To Feel This Damn Old)

I know I haven't posted in a while, but I just thought I'd share something funny I received in the mail today. Here's my first WTF!!!??? moment of 2010.


That's right it's official I got my AARP card. There's one slight problem. I'm only 28. Although the thought of being able to get senior discounts did cross my mind, Mix Tape Girl put an end to that very quickly. Especially when she offered to get me my very own baseball hat that says "Where's my damn discount?" That and I have to pay $16 bucks to pretend to be a senior. I'll keep my $16 bucks for now thank you.