Wednesday, February 27, 2008

Coloured cups are for soda

Sorry for the lack of updates. In case you haven't figured out, I went and got myself engaged. Yikes. Just kidding. I like it. But that's not what this post is about. No, no this shall be a rant.

Now when you get engaged all manner of people want to take you out and talk to you, etc, etc. I had no idea about this. Tell people that yes we're engaged but there is no immediate plan for a wedding or anything, and they still start to make plans for you. Which I should say we put a hold on right away. Just see how things pan out.

But this post won't even be about that. Okay so, like I mentioned lots of people (friends, immediate family, relatives, etc) want to go out to dinner etc, now to celebrate. Okay fine. Most places we went to were okay. Not all were my cup of tea. But two this past weekend really ticked me off.

We were invited to a seafood restaurant first off. Great, I love seafood. We order, everything goes fine. Now this isn't a place where you have a waiter, no you order in line, find a table, get your own drink from the fountain. Sounds odd I know but the grub is great, it'll make your bollocks tingle. Anyways, I pay for MTG and myself. We round the corner, MTG having advanced ahead to get a table for all of us. (A party of about 8) I grab a clear cup that is very near the soda fountain. It's clear, no biggie. I proceed to get me a Coke. I finished filling my cup and turn to walk toward the table. Then:

Lady behind counter (LBC): Excuse me sir!!! (Said loudly and ugly)

Me: huh?

LBC: May I see your cup?

I hand it over thinking maybe it's not properly clean or some other thing she noticed. LBC takes my cup, grabs a coloured cup (you know those brown clear ones, standard restaurant fair) and pours my drink into that cup.

LBC: The clear cups are for WATER ONLY!! Coloured cups are for soda!! AS CLEARLY STATED ON THE SIGN ON THE COUNTER!

I look down to her finger tapping the counter and see the sign, half covered up with soda and other spilled liquid, taped there in a plastic sleeve. If you didn't look down you'd miss it. Now I should note there were ample clear cups that were right next to the soda fountain. There were only 5 coloured cups there when I got my drink. I wanted to say something, I really did, but I turned the other cheek, after giving a "WTF" kind of stare back, without saying a word. At least the food was good.

Restaurant 2. Swanky Italian place.

Nice Italian place. It's a chain place sounds like Barrabas, you probably have one where you live. Anyways, long wait, like 1 hour. Doesn't bother me none, that what's expected on Saturday night. We order drinks, hmmm...their prices went up. $2 bucks for a soda. Que lastima! Okay but it was free refills anyways. Then came dinner, it was my turn to place my order. I got what I always get at Italian places, chicken parmesan.

Waitress: Would you like garlic mashed potatoes, grilled veg, pasta, fried zucchini...etc.

Who orders garlic mashed potatoes with chicken parmesan I thought.

Me: Uhm...grilled veg.

Waitress: Very good sir.

About an hour later, we got our meal. Two chicken breasts, and grilled veg stare back at me. I think where's the pasta? Chicken Parmesan always has pasta. Looking at the menu again that was left at the table, pasta is an optional side dish. I substituted grilled veg for it. This is most unholy. But figured I don't need pasta anyways. The Sangria's made up for it at least.

Restaurant 3:

We needed a drink, and time to ourselves. So we went to another local place that we've been to, from time to time, never had a problem. Till this night, when we got the oddest waitress every. I don't think she could have been older than 17.

Waitress: What can I get you to drink?

MTG: A Midori Margarita

Waitress: What's that?

We look at each other.

MTG: It's a margarita...

Waitress: Mahr..gur..itz..ah...

Look at each other again.

Waitress: I dunno if we have those.

We both know they do we've had them before.

MTG: How about a regular margarita.

Waitress: (Looking like a deer in headlights) I don't know what that is.

MTG: Uhm...How about a long island ice tea instead?

Waitress: Oh you want regular tea?

MTG: No a long island ice tea please?

Waitress: Long..long tea?

MTG: Long island ice tea

Waitress: okay.....(she tries to write it, MTG spells it out for her)

Waitress: And you sir?

Me: Bourbon and Coke please.

Waitress: Barbara Nicole? What's that?

MTG and I look at each other then around to see if were on some practical joke show.

MTG: No bourbon and coke.


I'm thinking this girl is on crack. I spell out for her what to give the bartender.

A few minutes later our drinks arrive. MTG Long Island Ice Tea is nothing but a gigantic glass of booze not mixed well. I get a have glass of whiskey on the rocks, not even with a coke.

Me: Uhm...excuse me? May I get a Coke as well please?

Waitress: Coook?

Me: Yeah Coca Cola?

Waitress blank stare...

Me: A soda.

Waitress: Ohhh..okay

MTG: I'll take one too.

The only plus side is the booze worked. Though MTG did get a bit wonga as her drink was nothing but pure booze. Made for fun conversation. Why we even stayed I dunno, we were too tired to go else where. WTF?


gizmorox said...

Yay! Congratulations to you and MTG. Having three friends get engaged in the last year, I'm familiar with the excessive amount of offered help. I wish I could tell you it gets better, but it doesn't.

Also, I totally would have asked for a different waitress. I would have walked my ass over to the hostess stand and said, "Listen, this girl obviously should be brought back to the preschool she escaped from and I'd like someone who speaks English."

Though I may start ordering Burboonickle everywhere I go.

Ishmael said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Artful Dodger said...

Thank you. Yeah people go nuts about weddings. Just have to tell them to calm down.

When we went to the restaurant it was late at night and there were only two waitresses. So there wasn't much choice. Plus we were too tired to complain and just wanted a drink and a meal. But still the girl was weird. Of course now MTG asks me if I want a Bur-boo-nickle every time I ask for a drink.

BeckEye said...